An Interview with Jennifer Margulis

Jennifer Margulis is the author of the new book Why Babies Do That: Baffling Baby Behavior Explained, an entertaining look at some of the most frequently asked questions about our mysterious little family members. Jennifer is also editor of, and contributing author to Toddler: Real Life Stories of Those Fickle, Irrational, Urgent, Tiny People We Love, a compendium of thoughtful and funny essays by moms and dads of toddlers. Jennifer is the creative nonfiction editor of the online journal LiteraryMama and contributes to the Mother Talk series of literary salons. I interviewed her about her recent book and how she gets the time to write with three little ones at home.

Octopus Jenny: Tell me a little about Why Babies do That and how you got the idea to write the book.

Jennifer M: The publisher actually invited me to write this book. They have a series (Why Dogs Do That, Why Cats Do That, etc.) and they wanted to branch out into baby books. The editor was actually expecting her first child and I think that was one of their motivations. But the idea behind the book is to inspire and inform parents, especially new parents, about baby behavior. Babies are bizarre little creatures, they do a lot of weird stuff, and this book helps explain why. So it's meant to be both informative and reassuring (and fun to read).

O.J.: How did you learn the answers to these questions?

Jennifer M: I spent several months researching the answers, talking to specialists (psychologists, doctors, researchers, and moms--who are the ones who know the most). I have also worked on a child survival campaign in Africa and have three children of my own. So I brought my professional and personal experience to the book as well.

O.J.: What was the most interesting thing you learned about babies while you were researching the book?

Jennifer M: That's a hard question to answer. I learned so many interesting things. Perhaps the most interesting was about head banging. I had no idea it was so normal or common (I have three children and no head bangers) and that even babies who are getting lots of attention may bang their heads. The American Academy of Child Psychiatry has reported that up to 20% of otherwise normal babies will bang their heads. I mentioned this at a talk I gave and there were so many people in the audience nodding in agreement--all parents of head bangers who were otherwise normal, healthy kids.

O.J.: Tell me a little about your other book, Toddler.

Jennifer M: Toddler is the book I wanted to read but couldn't find on the shelves when my girls were little. I had my first two children 19 months apart and to say I felt like I was going crazy is a gross understatement. My "easy" baby morphed into a really challenging toddler and my second child came out screaming and screamed for what felt like forever. I wanted to see how other parents tackled the toddler years--I was so hungry for real-life stories from real moms and dads. How to books never really helped me (though I read them and continue to read them) but I always appreciated reading about other peoples experiences. That's why I like to read blogs, too.

O.J.: You mean my little angel could become... difficult? Say it ain't so.

Jennifer M: Not your baby, of course!

O.J.: Do you have any favorite blogs you can recommend to parents of young ones?

Jennifer M: There are so many good blogs out there for new parents. I really like “So Close,” “Fussy,” and “Suburban Turmoil,” but there are dozens of others I enjoy reading as well. (And if you visit the blogs that are stops on my baby blog book tour, you’ll find all the best ones!)

O.J.: Based on reading Toddler, it sounds like your mom was, um, a challenge. How does she feel about the book?

Jennifer M: She said: "ripped jeans, floss in my teeth? Sounds like an accurate description of me!" and she has bought books for everyone she knows, and continues to give them as gifts. My mom is very upfront about her shortcomings and never pretended to be a good mom, or to like being a mom. She's an internationally known microbiologist, one of the only women ever elected to the National Academy of Science. She's been awarded a presidential medal of honor. So at least she has a legitimate excuse for neglecting us!

O.J.: Any other books in the works?

Jennifer M: I'm working on a book about West Africa right now, and I just found out that my family and I will spend next year in Niger. I got a Fulbright Fellowship and I'll be researching the book and teaching a class or two at the university in Niamey.

O.J.: That sounds fantastic. How do you think your kids will handle the transition? Are you doing anything special to prepare them?

Jennifer M: I think it will be easier for my little ones than for my husband, who doesn’t like the heat. We talk about it all the time, we’re learning French together, we play pretend stuffy games about going on airplanes and being in Africa. It will be a huge change for all of us but it should be a fascinating experience.

O.J.: How's your blog tour going?

Jennifer M: It's wonderful so far. It's great to see what bloggers write about. Fussy's entry was hilarious and I had a PR person in Portland (whom I've corresponded with because I'm working on updating a guidebook) who reads her regularly tell me she was buying the book for a friend. It's amazing to be able to go all the way to South Africa (So Close is on the tour. Her stop was May 2nd) and Western Australia but stay in my pajamas!

O.J.: Finally, how DO you find the time for all these projects with three kids? Some days I can barely find the time to make myself a bowl of cereal.

Jennifer M: It's not easy and if you could see my house right now (it looks like a train crashed in the living room--the kids decided to make a fort with the couch and... well, I'll spare you the details) you wouldn't be so impressed. Seriously, housework is the first thing to go. In order to be a productive writer (and this is the way my husband and I support our family of five) and an attentive mom, I really have to prioritize. I don't get enough sleep and my house is often a disaster (which is honestly hard for me. I used to look forward to cleaning my apartment on Saturday mornings when I was in my 20s!).

I also write magazine articles, my weekly column in the Ashland Daily Tidings called "Tales From the Crib," and a monthly travel article. And I consult with other writers to help them get published. Writing is my job. If I don't do it we don't eat. I think that's the secret. Also, I have a very supportive husband who also works from home and we switch off with the kids as much as possible to give each other time to write. I really care about being a good mom though, which is why I'm often sleep-deprived. Even if I have a pressing deadline, I wait until the kids go to sleep before I finish any work leftover from the morning (morning is my time to write, afternoon is my husband's). My other secret is dried mango. I swear it makes you smarter and more focused and I eat dollar-depleting quantities of it when I'm on deadline.